My son asked me, “Mom, will you make me sleep till I go to high school or even after that?”
And I said “Grown up children sleep on their own.”
“But, mom, our love also grows when we grow, and I love you more every day, and that means I need you more every day.” He adds up, “Mum, why do parents always want their children to grow up early, do things like big boys/girls? Do parents not like small kids, and things they do?”
And then the questions started raining, and rather than finding their answers, I started questioning myself for many reasons. I was lost; lost in the world I created for my kids and myself.
“Mum, don’t you like when I ask you to watch a football match with me or play a game?” I said, “Yes, honey! Of course I do.”
“But then why do you not do that often?”, he said.
I had no answer to this! Deep down we both knew the answer that I am usually busy juggling office and home, and not able to find enough time to do this. But I didn’t want to give this answer to him, rather I asked myself, Why do I need to be that busy that I miss these chances that will never come again in life?
“Mom, why are you always cranky in the evening, when you come back from office, and don’t seem interested in whatever I say about my day in school, with friends, in the playground, but you always ask about my homework, notebooks, school dairy?”
“Why are you always in a hurry to cook, to serve us dinner, to make us sleep, to wake us up early in the morning, to complete our homework? Why don’t you sit with us for some time?”
I again had no answer to this!
“Mom, you know I like it when you are at home with us, when you take an off from work, or on a Sunday, and we sit and watch TV with a cup of tea; and when we dance together, even if I don’t like to dance on those silly songs you dance on; and when we lie down together on the couch for hours, and watch my old baby videos.”
“I love that too, my baby”, I said. And again I got lost in scratching out the real meaning behind these questions and replies.
“Mom, I can see many times you are very tired, but still cook for us, help us in homework, I always want to help you in kitchen, but you don’t allow me use knife, or handle hot pots, or go near gas stove. So tell me how can I do that?” and I laughed at this, and my son laughed even louder, and I asked, “Why did you laugh?” He replied, “Because you were happy and laughing.”
I couldn’t think beyond this! Just that, I have everything, but still I am losing a lot that will never come again; my children’s childhood; their innocence; their silly stories; their genuine emotions about the world around; those cuddly nights; their soft, chubby cheeks; those squeezing hugs full of love and that duckling trail- like after mama duck 😉
We must not take all this for granted. Our kids give us everything they have unconditionally, and our time and smile is all that they look for!